This has been sat in my folder for a while, the more personal the tale the harder it is to post.
Language is much more than the words we say. Language is the meaning behind those words, both the literal definition and the meaning we put on it ourselves. ‘Yes’ indicates the positive but said in the right tone of voice it can mean the very opposite. ‘Literally’ used in certain ways can mean ‘figuratively’ – but I’m not here to argue about the benefits of a language that grows and changes with its speakers.
As an asexual person I can’t use the words ‘hot’ or ‘sexy’. I’m not saying that I’ve been prohibited from using those words; this is all my own problem. It’s just that they make me uncomfortable; they feel wrong on my tongue. But I still find people attractive, just because I don’t feel sexual attraction doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate a nice face.
The problem is the lack of words to use that don’t have that sexual connotation that squicks me out. ‘Pretty’ is good, ‘beautiful’ and ‘handsome’ are perfectly workable but after that I’m starting to run out of words that don’t sound weird in everyday conversation. I could turn full Northern English Granny and start calling people ‘bonny’ but I think that may get me some funny looks.
The thesaurus has plenty of options, and all are viable in the written format but I can hardly turn around and call someone ‘captivating’ or ‘prepossessing’. Can you imagine how pretentious I would sound? I guess ‘fetching’ is ok but I usually apply that to inanimate objects not to people.
What I’m saying here is that I need more words. Bring me your words! This is a cry for help for adjectives I can use that don’t make me feel squirmy to say.
I love language, I’m studying language right now yet I still feel it lacks in some areas. I want it to expand to include my experience and everyone else’s. I don’t just want words for me to use, I want words for us all. I don’t know what other people want, I can only start with myself and work from there.
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